A Letter to My Future Teenage Son

Inspired by Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop.

Prompt #4:  A Letter to Your Future Teen

Dear Tyler:

I know that this is going to be a hard letter to write and at the end I will probably be bawling my eyes out.

You are only four-years-old right now.  You call me Super Mommy and still need help in the bathroom.  You are funny, clever, and love to cuddle with me.  You do not want to leave my side.  You say that mommy and daddy are your best friends. You do have a bit of the devil in you, you get angry and we are still trying to get you to “Use your words”.  We punish you by taking the Bat Cave away that you got for Christmas.

I know as you grow, in some ways it will be easier for me as you become more independent. You won’t need anyone to pour your drinks for you, or to work the three remotes we have for our television, and you will pick out you own clothes and dress and bathe yourself.

But mostly, I know it will be harder as I allow (do I really have a choice?) you to spread your wings.  I am a bit frightened because I have no idea what it is like to be a teenaged boy, although I can imagine, having been on the receiving end.

I worry a lot about your health, physical and mental, coming from two sick parents. Will you hate us for any diseases we may give you?  Will you hate that we are disabled and cannot work, and that because of that you may have to work harder for the things you want?  Or will you love us for it?  Maybe not as a teenager, but maybe as an adult?

You’ve never known your daddy and I without the swallowing of lots of pills and the safe that I have where I lock up my narcotics.  Will this make you want to try drugs more or make you realize that drugs are only for sick people?

I’m not sure what your father is thinking but I plan on being honest with you.  I want to tell you my experiences with drinking, drugs and sex and how I feel about them when I look back. I am probably not going to change your mind, but at least you will know that those things all existed way back in the 20th century!  I want to tell you what being a teenaged girl was like so that hopefully you will respect your female peers.

While I know you will no longer be cuddling with me on the couch, I hope that sometimes you will hug and kiss me and won’t be too embarrassed by your old mom!

And finally Tyler, no matter what you will look like and who you are, I will always love you. Through the arguments we will no doubt have about curfews, the car, smoking and more, I will never stop loving you.

And, I just want to throw this out to you, honey, that the offer to be your best friend still stands.

Yep, I’m crying.

Love,

Mom

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About mamasick

Emily Cullen is a pen-name. I suffer from chronic illnesses and diseases which include Bipolar Disorder, Asthma, Diabetes and Fibromyalgia. I had battled Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis but there is no longer evidence of me having these diseases and my Rheumatologist has declared them to be "burnt out" of my system. I am separated from my husband, “Grant”. Our son, “Tyler” was born in September of 2006 and suffers from tics and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and is delayed in fine and gross motor skills. In my blog I seek to let sick moms know that they are not the only ones going through this, and to educate people about what can happens when one becomes catastrophically ill. I also strive to break down stereotypes of what a “Welfare Mom” is like. Anything that I have gone through due to being sick, is written on the pages of Mama Sick.
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