I Probably Shouldn’t Be Writing This Right Now

I am still recovering from injuring myself in the pool (See First Pool Day).  I start feeling better but helping Tyler get dressed usually makes me take a few steps back in healing.  My Costochondritis flare has gotten worse as well.  Having a Costo flare always freaks me out.  Rest is the most important thing for it, along with heat and other remedies, but it can be very slow to heal.  I am sitting here sweating to death with two heating pads wrapped around my rib cage.  I have called my massage therapist and we are going to see if we can connect tomorrow.

Something that makes my Costo worse when I am in a flare is coffee.  So no caffeine for me. Nooooooo!  I cannot stand upright without caffeine.

The pain is making me even more fatigued and for one reason or another this week I have not been able to sleep well.  Tyler continues to wake up two to three times a night and seems to be only satisfied sleeping in my bed.  (That’s a whole other post!)

I feel scared about taking care of him.  Costo is the type of condition that just really freaks me out. Grant has a doctor’s appointment and Francesca is coming over so I don’t have to be alone with him.  I feel like I am barely holding my head above the seas of laundry and dishes awaiting my attention too.

Yesterday I got a notice that my COBRA is ending on September 11th (great day).  I am in a race against time to see if I can be declared Disabled in order to extend it.  I called my Rheumatologist to see how he was doing with my paperwork and I was treated to the smarmy attitude of one of his admins.  I’m sorry that you are mad that I gave the paperwork to the doctor instead of you but he is the one who is going to be filling out the forms and he was the one whom I had to talk with about them, not you. GET OVER IT LADY, THIS IS MY LIFE! I am so tired of dealing with such rude, uncaring doctors’ administrative people.  I feel like they look at me like just one more pain in their ass and sometimes I feel like they think of me as a hypochondriac.  But…why am I caring what they think?  As bitchy as they are to me is how nicely I try to be back to them but it’s really hard when they are so unsympathetic.

Oh and my legs, yeah, they still hurt too.

Okay, pity party over.  It’s nice to have the luxury of ranting on one’s own blog.

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About mamasick

Emily Cullen is a pen-name. I suffer from chronic illnesses and diseases which include Bipolar Disorder, Asthma, Diabetes and Fibromyalgia. I had battled Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis but there is no longer evidence of me having these diseases and my Rheumatologist has declared them to be "burnt out" of my system. I am separated from my husband, “Grant”. Our son, “Tyler” was born in September of 2006 and suffers from tics and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and is delayed in fine and gross motor skills. In my blog I seek to let sick moms know that they are not the only ones going through this, and to educate people about what can happens when one becomes catastrophically ill. I also strive to break down stereotypes of what a “Welfare Mom” is like. Anything that I have gone through due to being sick, is written on the pages of Mama Sick.

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