It makes me feel so guilty to say this but whenever I know we will have a long weekend with Tyler being home, I get anxious about how I will handle him and how I will feel doing it. I love being with my son but my body just does not want to cooperate. Laying down during the middle of the day is a must for me and I do get some energy back doing it but there are just some days next week where that will just not be possible. Like Thanksgiving Day, for example!
On Tuesday morning I have a WIC appointment that Tyler has to come to. I will then bring him to daycare. But in the afternoon I have a follow-up appointment with my endocrinologist. I’m stressed out. I know it sounds crazy, but will I be able to have a nap before Tyler comes home? And then on Wednesday, his daycare closes at 3:30 and then we have the long weekend. Tyler is so active and rarely naps at home. How will I keep up?
Grant’s Crohn’s Disease is still flaring. I feel badly to ask him to do more than he can even if I am exhausted. I get so frustrated. I want to be able to take Tyler out to the park if the warm weather continues, but my body just balks. I want to have the energy I used to have when he was a baby and I spent endless hours playing with him. Tired yes, but about the same amount of tired as any normal, sleep-deprived mom. I miss the joy I used to have at the aspect of a long weekend to be with him. Now I am just scared.
But I also realize I have to stop looking at next week as one big long day and take each day as it comes. And I also have to remember that despite how I view my shortcomings as a mom, Tyler somehow still thinks I am the greatest mom in the world and that even though he has a lot more activity at daycare, all he really wants to do is be with me, no matter what we do or don’t do.
Just wanted to say I know how you feel and feel guilty for feeling the same way.
I don’t know if it’s possible for you (it’s something I find very hard to do), but maybe one or two of Tyler’s friends would be willing to host him for a playdate over the long weekend so you can have a break? For me, that’s really hard to ask folks to do, especially when I don’t know them well. Or maybe you and Grant can tag-team taking care of Tyler since neither of you is well?
Hang in there, and try to remind yourself to follow your own advice and take it one day at a time.
.-= Aviva´s last blog ..Over-Busy Day =-.
Dear Mamasick,
I know first hand how true it is that Tyler just wants to be home with his Mom and Dad. Whether it be watching the same Spiderman/Batman for the sixth consecutive time…I’ve come to the conclusion that he must be trying to memorize the lines and thus has a very LUCRATIVE job prospect as an anchor and the family’s money woes will no longer be an issue. Tyler also “inherited” not sick parents but “inherited” there love for music, adventure, and just plain silly fun.
Yes, a long weekend is daunting, but I would like to remind one and all that “giving me a break” from the family problems is exactly the opposite. Since I, Francesca, have been plagued by my own lately, oddly enough, it is a welcome diversion to join in the insanity. Left Mom a voicemail half joking that I read an aromatherapy article on how to get your child to take a nap. Mom, Dad, and all are probably willing to try anything remotely helpful that is healthy to aid in what Francesca calls “good sleep hygiene. Sounds like someone, namely me, has seen her share of sleep medicine doctors.
Now that all of you are dying to know the “magic” pill, it is the aromatherapy scent of “Rosewood is soothing for tired, grumpy children who don’t want to go to bed.”….as quoted on page 15 of Aromatherapy…A Guide of home use by Christine Westwood, reprinted March 1993.
Let’s not all go out and run to purchase this scented oil…if it works I’m sure it will be more popular than the Wii. Perhaps we should take out stock in some of the manufacturing companies and thus is another solution for our financial woes.
Best of luck to all, and please remember, asking someone for help may actually be making that person feel important, vital, and connected to our ever growing universe.
Love to all,
Francesca