Inspired by Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop.
3.) A Boy You Had a Crush on…Where Is He Now?
I was a “late bloomer”, dating no one and kissing just one boy in my four years of high school. I “blossomed” into a very attractive young woman my senior year of high school, but I wasn’t any where close to being ready for any kind of sexual behavior. I was asked out by two boys for my senior prom, but I didn’t like them in a dating kind of way, and I didn’t want to go as friends, so I politely said no to both of them.
But boy, did I have it bad for a first generation American Turkish boy who was a grade ahead of me! Picture the classic tall, dark and handsome. I knew “Adem” from a girl in my choir class he was dating. She was a junior, he was a sophomore and I was a lowly freshman. They broke up in her senior year and it wasn’t until I was a sophomore that I felt comfortable approaching him. When I say approach I mean I would consider me saying “Hi Adem” at his locker and him saying, “What’s up?” to me a victory. God, I was pathetic! So pathetic, in fact, that I worked at his junior prom just so I could see him in his tux…with someone else as his date. Oh, God, why did I do that? The pain that I felt watching him dance with this FRESHMAN, blonde bombshell who looked like Madonna broke my heart! Of course, Adem knew what he had coming to him with her after the prom, and I had never even kissed a boy!
It turned out that Adem and “Madonna” had a fight at the prom. All my friends were telling me, “Come on, ask him to dance!”, but I just couldn’t.
I never got to tell Adem how I felt, I just was too shy and not ready for someone as advanced as he was.
But this story is just beginning.
By college, I had turned into a brunette bombshell and I had gotten some “experience”, well only the one THE EXPERIENCE with my now ex-boyfriend. My best friend at the time ran into Adem a bar. She asked if he remembered me and he said, “Yeah!” and she gave him my number. And he called me and asked me out on a date! If you are keeping score this is about nine years later from when I first had my crush!
So, we went on the date and in five minutes I realize that this guy is kind of a dope. Why had I never realized that in high school? No offense meant to the police, but he had become a cop. Yes, so now he was STILL hot and he was a sexy cop! The Twenty-Something Me is thinking, “Ugh, first date, last date.”, but the Teenage Me is screaming, “Say yes if he asks you out again!”
And he did, so I did. We are on another “stimulating” date. “Go home with him! Please, go home with him for ME!”, the Teenage Me is begging.
It was a bit of a power trip and a payback to poor Teenage Me for the Twenty-Something Me to go to his place after dinner. We are making out, “YES!!!”, but then I pulled back. I had only slept with one guy in my whole life, who would be the second was, to me, still a big deal. When I told him that he said, “Now I want to sleep with you even more!” An almost-virgin, I guess, was a big appeal.
And so…I DID IT with him and it was great. The Teenage Me was high-fiving the Twenty-Something me.
I never fell in love with Adem and he wasn’t interested in having that kind of relationship with anyone. But, ahem, a woman has…needs, and so Adem became my…”booty call”, “friends with benefits”, whatever you want to call it for about three or four years! It was fun being with a cop, doing IT on his police car, him ignoring minor crimes while we had sex, you know. Please note there was never any handcuffs, I am not in to that sort of thing.
When my husband came into the picture, I told Adem I that I was seriously seeing someone and he politely bowed out.
About six years ago I was with my mom, getting my wedding and engagement rings cleaned and there he was. He had a second job as a security guard at the jewelry store. He told me he had become a father, by accident, but that he had custody of his daughter. I told him I was just starting to try to have a child.
No sooner had we left the jewelry store than my mother exclaims, “Oh my God, is he HOT, he is SO HOT!” My mother had never acted that way in front of me ever. It was so awkward, knowing that I had slept with him about a hundred (more or less) times. I said, “Mom, calm down, stop saying that!”
Now we are Face Book friends, but that is all. He is 43 and has never been married, but because of this post I looked on his page and his status says, “In a Relationship”, which for him is something to say. He is a nice guy and I do wish the best for him. And the Teenage Me thanks him very, very much.