Women Bosses? Ugh!

Inspired by Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop.

Prompt 5.) Write a post where the first and last sentence contain any form of the word “boss.”

Words of advice:  never take a job without taking an interview with whom your direct boss is going to be.

That was my mistake when I took my last job as a recruiter for a semi-large firm in April of 2007.  I wasn’t stupid, really, as their policy was whatever manager was available would interview a person for a job.

My first day of work, I could tell my direct manager, “Carrie”, loathed me.  She had just had a baby, I had just had a baby.  She probably weighed close to 175 pounds.  I was the same height and weighed 117 pounds. After the arrival of Tyler I had gotten very thin, mystifying my doctors.  The scariest thing though was they were checking me for cancer!  On top of that I had just recovered from a nasty stomach virus.  I looked skeletal, horrific, I looked like one of those “heroin chic” models in my size four office clothes.  My new colleagues would come up to me and say, ” You just had a baby?  You look amazing!” and I could feel Carrie seething at me.  No one was telling her she looked amazing.

I swear, Carrie reminded me of all of the petty nothingness you went through in high school, the jealousy over the pretty girls, the cattiness.  I knew more than she did in some things, I had very specialized skills, and she hated that.  She knew my salary, which was was quite high, and probably fairly close to hers, as I was brought in to fill a void the company was lacking in.

The deal was I was to work from home because the commute took me almost two hours one way, but I would train for at the office for two weeks.  It was right then that Grant’s mental health started to decline rapidly, which would ultimately lead to his being fired.  I knew that Grant wasn’t doing well.  I was uncomfortable being so far from him, but I needed this job, this brand new job.

On my first week there, one of the administrative staff burst into the office that I shared with Carrie.  “You’re husband is on the phone, he says it is urgent.”

“Grant, what’s wrong, where are you?”  Grant was crying, he could barely speak.  “Emily, I-I am sorry. I can’t take it any more.  I want to kill myself, I am going to kill myself.”  He was on the road, out on his job.  He was THREE hours away from me.  “Do you want me to come and get you?”  “No, it’s just…I think I could come home, I NEED you home!”  “Okay, okay, I am two hours away from home but I will get there, Grant!”

It was my first week on the job.  I did not know yet the depth of Carrie’s cold-hearted bitchiness.  I had to leave, but what excuse?  I could not lie to Carrie, as she had heard some of the conversation. I said, “Can I please take a walk outside with you?”  “Sure”, she said.  I told her that my husband was going to kill himself and I needed to get home right away. “Well of course, of course”, she said.  I was so relieved!  Then she said, “Emily…ah…do you think this is the best time for you to be working here?”  I didn’t get it.   “What do you mean?”  “I mean, you just started this job, your husband is obviously very sick.  I’m just saying…perhaps this is not the right time for you to be starting a job.  You have to learn an awful lot of stuff, and your mind is obviously elsewhere.”

I couldn’t believe it!  Carrie was trying to fire me!  She hated me from day one and was looking for any excuse!  I came back at her and told her I was 100% dedicated to this company and the work I was doing here, and I most CERTAINLY could handle this job.  Of course I was in complete shock. New job verses a very sick husband.  I told her I would be in the next day.

A few weeks later Grant agreed to commit to an in-patient stay for mental illness.  This had come after he had spent time in the hospital.  By this time, I was working from home and I didn’t DARE tell Carrie what was going on!  What business was it of HERS what I did in my off-time as long as I was putting in my 40 hours?  I remember one night going to bed at 2:30 and being ready to work from home right on the dot of 9 a.m.  No one was the wiser.

When I took this job and I heard that my direct supervisor was a mother of two with a 6 month old, and I had a 7.5 month old, I thought she was going to be a dream manager.  But she turned out to be cut from the same cloth as Satan.

Woman bosses?  Never again for me, if by some miracle I was able to go back to working full-time, which since it’s been over three years, does not look good.

What have your experiences been with woman managers or bosses?  Good or bad? 

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About mamasick

Emily Cullen is a pen-name. I suffer from chronic illnesses and diseases which include Bipolar Disorder, Asthma, Diabetes and Fibromyalgia. I had battled Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis but there is no longer evidence of me having these diseases and my Rheumatologist has declared them to be "burnt out" of my system. I am separated from my husband, “Grant”. Our son, “Tyler” was born in September of 2006 and suffers from tics and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and is delayed in fine and gross motor skills. In my blog I seek to let sick moms know that they are not the only ones going through this, and to educate people about what can happens when one becomes catastrophically ill. I also strive to break down stereotypes of what a “Welfare Mom” is like. Anything that I have gone through due to being sick, is written on the pages of Mama Sick.
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