Tuesdays With Tyler: Not Special Enough

Tyler has some special needs but often they are not readily apparent.  Because of this, I find that people like to declare that he is fine and I am making too big a deal about minor things.  This, is for them:

When you see my six-year-old son have a temper-tantrum that is more suitable to a three-year-old, it is not due to my lack of parenting skills, it is a part of his diagnoses.

When you see me give into my son, it is not because he is spoiled.  It is because I have been correcting him all day and he needs to win some battles, he needs to feel some control over his life.  I don’t want him to think of himself as a “bad boy”.

My son’s poor writing skills are not because I have not worked with him.  He is delayed in his fine motor skills.  I have worked with him but I am not an Occupational Therapist.

Yes, my son does not appear to have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  That’s because when you see him he is having fun, there is no stress in his life. And the symptoms you do see, like him needing to stand in one place while we walk or him having to take a step forward and a step back are not due to him being just a silly kid.

You are not there when I need to pull him away from the sink to stop him from washing his hands.  You are not there when he screams in terror if he is left alone in a room.  You are not there when he hits me and then guiltily apologizes, telling me that even when he hits me he always love me.

All of his doctors as well as the professionals in his school do not doubt me because it is obvious when he is examined, obvious when he cannot stand in a line with the rest of the class, or freaks out when he gets dirty, and obvious when he submits a writing sample.  It is so obvious that he receives Occupational and Speech Therapy in school.

The only people it is not obvious to are you, so when you get your degree in Pediatric Neurology or in teaching, feel free to offer your opinion.

Thank you.






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About mamasick

Emily Cullen is a pen-name. I suffer from chronic illnesses and diseases which include Bipolar Disorder, Asthma, Diabetes and Fibromyalgia. I had battled Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis but there is no longer evidence of me having these diseases and my Rheumatologist has declared them to be "burnt out" of my system. I am separated from my husband, “Grant”. Our son, “Tyler” was born in September of 2006 and suffers from tics and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and is delayed in fine and gross motor skills. In my blog I seek to let sick moms know that they are not the only ones going through this, and to educate people about what can happens when one becomes catastrophically ill. I also strive to break down stereotypes of what a “Welfare Mom” is like. Anything that I have gone through due to being sick, is written on the pages of Mama Sick.
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