About mamasick
Emily Cullen is a pen-name.
My life changes too fast to have a real bio, but here goes: I suffer from chronic illnesses and diseases which have progressed. My diseases include life-threatening conditions such as Lupus With Rheumatoid Arthritis Overlap and Bipolar Disorder. My other diseases include Fibromyalgia, Interstitial Cystitis and Myofascial Pain, and I no longer can remember them all.
My husband, “Grant” is similarly disabled with Crohn’s Disease, Mental Illness and Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease. Our son, “Tyler” was born in September of 2006 and makes our struggle worthwhile. Tyler is a child with special needs and has been diagnosed with Tourette’s Syndrome and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
In 2012, due to my initial disability case being denied in 2011, and being unable to work full-time since 2008, we were forced to leave our New Jersey home and become a “transient” sort of family. We lived in Massachusetts for six months with my mother until September, when we moved to Grant’s hometown, a Cleveland suburb, to stay with his parents.
Long term chronic illness can impact families in so many ways, and in my blog I seek to let sick moms know that they are not the only ones going through this, and to educate people about what can happens when one becomes catastrophically ill. I also strive to break down stereotypes of what a “Welfare Mom” is like. Anything that I have gone through due to being sick, such as my continuing struggle to be believed that I am as sick as I claim to be, is written on the pages of Mama Sick.
I found your site here on Facebook and want to join the giveaway for the art on your earlier post. But there is no “leave a comment” to click on. So I’ll leave a comment here and hope you find it. I love her art and would love to win a piece! Thank you for this generous giveaway!
(I hope you find the correct meds and feel better soon. Sending prayers.)
Linda Harbin
Linda Harbin´s last [type] ..Valentines Day Tricycle Wheels Lace heart Valentine Head over Wheels in love Original mixed media 8 by 8 in by MidwestieLady
I cannot tell you how much I feel your pain and how incredibly lucky I feel to have stumbled upon your site. I, too, have multiple diagnoses and it is hell. On a really good day, I look and sound normal–actually well above normal! For years I was able to hide the illnesses. Over the course of many years, those “normal looking” days have become fewer and ultimately non-existent. I live my life now from minute to minute not knowing how I will feel. I am struggling every waking moment with just leaving my bedroom, let alone my home. Over this last 2 yrs, my Bipolar has become increasingly difficult to deal with, especially when compounded with the constant, excruciating pain I felt physically from what is now being diagnosed as Lupus, but previously it was just “unknown”. I was able to find some “work from home” positions that didn’t require me to continue at the pace I had been trying so hard (and failing) to keep up with, however, due to my physical/emotional/mental health deterioration, I simply could not produce the results that were needed. I am not a lazy individual, however, it became a serious struggle to get out of bed or answer my phone. I don’t know which part is the worst—the physical or the mental. They are 2 separate medical conditions but they have both run my life for the past 10+ yrs. I refused to apply for disability for years feeling deeply ashamed and sure that at some point it would get better. It only got worse and I finally had to apply for disability. Today I got a letter in the mail: DENIED. Apparently, I am just “not sick enough” and therefore, I am “not disabled”. Right then, now if only someone would please explain that to my body…. I am up right now filling out my appeals forms, got a lawyer/ legal representative today etc… I, too, am going through a divorce. My husband (who has been married 3 times now) is divorcing me because I was too financially draining on him (even though it never stopped him from going out gambling with other women and taking his boat out, his brand new truck, the 3600 sq ft house, etc..) And I have been — wait, let’s see… how did he put it again… the “the worst wife ever”. Apparently, my illnesses were a real pain in his ass and cramped his style. He is very convincing as the suffering husband – he had me convinced and crying, begging, apologizing, promising to get better, etc… So I have just been randomly googling and that’s how I came across your site. And I am so glad I did. Please hang in there because if I have to do it, then damn it, I want to at least be able to read this blog! It is the ONLY thing that has made this day a little better. You are a very brave and honest person and I wish there were more of you in the world. It would be a MUCH better world for sure. Thank you.